Chris Auman’s Blog

Work from Home Scam

Work From Home Scam

So I was looking for a job on the Internets one day and I happened upon an ad for a work from home scam. It was in the form of a company in search of a Customer Service Representative. At first, there was no reason to suspect that the ad wasn’t legit, but judge for yourself:

XXXX, Inc. is a leading custom software, web, and database development company delivering world-class outsourcing services for both Fortune 500 and venture start-up companies around the globe. Currently, we are looking for a Customer Service Representative.

RESPONSIBILITIES:

• Follows departmental policies and procedures, particularly in regards to customer confidentiality

• Accurately enters or confirms customer information into database; initiates and/or completes proper request forms in assisting customers.

• Effectively uses computer systems for tracking, information gathering, and/or troubleshooting.

• Performs any other duties assigned

MINIMUM KNOWLEDGE, SKILLS AND ABILITIES REQUIRED:

High school education or equivalent. Must be able to perform data entry and basic computer skills.

Seemed like your run-of-the-mill customer service rep job ad. There was no mention of pay or location, although I assumed that it was Chicago-based since it was advertised on the Chicago Reader’s website. I sent in my résumé and to my surprise received an email response from Recruiting Agent, Daniel Clarke. My application is under review, the email said. Mr. Clark also informed me that his employer was looking for a customer service agent to work from home for $20 an hour.

Here is the email:

January 26, 2009, 8:25:21 AM CST

My name is Daniel Clarke, Recruiting Agent to XXXX, Inc. We have received your job application posted to us; your resume is under review. Below is the applicant we are looking for.

JOB DESCRIPTION:

Class Title: Customer Service Representative

Class Code: 9933

Job Class: Independent Employee (Work from Home)

Pay Grade: 509

Salary: $20/Hour, 5-8hrs a day, Monday – Friday (Monthly Payment)

RESPONSIBILITIES:

• Follows departmental policies and procedures, particularly in regards to customer confidentiality

• Effectively uses computer systems for tracking, information gathering, and/or troubleshooting.

• Receiving and disbursement of Payment to Orphanage Homes

REQUIREMENTS:

• Phone Line & Internet

• Computer PC or Notebook

BRIEF INTERVIEW:

• Do you have a Computer and Internet and a Phone Line?

• Do you have another Job and if yes, Is it a full-time Job or a part -time Job.

• Will you be able to dedicate at least 5 hours (Part-time) or 8 hrs (Full Time) per day 9am-2pm or 9am-5pm, Monday – Friday?

The “Payment to Orphanage Homes” line made me suspect this was a work from home scam, but whatever, you get desperate sometimes, and let’s face it, even with a substantial amount of padding, my résumé is not all that impressive. At any rate, I answered Daniel Clark’s brief interview questions and received a response the following day:

January 27, 2009, 10:09:21 AM CST

Thank you for your email, your answers to the question has been received and approved. You will be working from home as an independent employee and you will need to have a computer with internet connectivity at home in order to be effective in this job.

This is a work from home position and your location do not matter, you will be working on General Customer Service duties, your assignments will be made available to you via email, phone and IM, you will be assigned with a supervisor that will guide you through your assignments, your salary will be made available to you by certified check or wire transfer.

Attached is a Contract Agreement Form (CAF) with contains our terms and conditions associated with this position. Review the contract agreement form carefully, sign the last page the CAF and return back via email or fax. Contact via email as soon as you have sent the signed CAF to transfer you to your supervisor for your complete employment profile and assignment updates.

Regards,

Daniel Clarke

Recruiter Officer

XXXX, INC

Suddenly Daniel Clarke’s diction and grammar appear to suffer (“your location do not matter”?) and payment by wire transfer should have been a red flag. At any rate, I signed the form and emailed it back. It may have been at this point that I noticed that Mr. Clark’s e-mail address was somewhat suspicious as well. The domain name was not the company he professed to work for but a Yahoo email account. Classic work from home scam and the following day I received a congratulatory email from Mr. Clark:

January 28, 2009, 4:13:13 AM CST

Congratulations!! This is a confirmation message to let you know that your signed CAF has been received successfully. Fill out the Form below and have them forward to your Supervisor (Mr. Joe) to Email Address: xxxxxxx@yahoo.com for your complete employment file setuP.

You are required to setup a screen name with Yahoo messenger immediately and instant message your supervisor (Mr. Joe) on yahoo ID: joe2desk, to provide you with more information on the job and when to start working.

Note: The Yahoo messenger will be your major means of communication

Congratulation ones again for been part of XXXX, INC, please contact your supervisor via email and Instant Messenger so that he can provide you with more information on the job and your complete employment setup.

Regards,

Daniel Clarke

Recruiter Officer

XXXX, INC.

Mr. Clark seemed genuinely elated at my hiring. “Congratulation ones again,” he had written. I filled out the employee data form and forwarded it to “Mr. Joe”. I was willing to play this out provided they didn’t ask me for my social security number. The next day I received an email from my new supervisor, Mr. Joe:

January 29, 2009, 7:18:35 AM CST

Welcome to XXXX Inc, My name is Joe Phillip; I will be your Supervisor for the Customer Service Representative.

You will need to be online on the yahoo messenger to receive updates on your daily assignment, your working hours are from 8am-4pm or 8am-1pm your time, depending on the hours you applied.

Note: The time you are online determines your pay as we have a program installed to the yahoo messenger that keep tracks of the time you are online. You will receive a paycheck at the end of every 30 days via regular mail.

You will need to report directly to me for anything you need, I will be ONLINE ON THE YAHOO MESSENGER to guide you through your assignments.

My yahoo ID is joe2desk; instant messenger me now to receive updates on your assignments.

Joe Phillip, Supervisor

XXXX, INC

I went ahead and set up a Yahoo IM account so that I could communicate with Joe Phillip, Supervisor. I received this e-mail the following day.

January 30, 2009, 9:42:39 AM CST

The Company has introduced a Domestic Petty Cash Payment; The purpose for this funds is to help employees solve any domestic or emergency assignments that may require the use of funds. E.g. Shipping Payments, Sales Payments, Payments to Orphanages, Packaging/Tapes, Bills and any other related domestic Payments.

OBJECTIVES: Receive Petty Cash Payment

INSTRUCTIONS:

• Notify Supervisor as soon as you receive payment by regular mail, FedEx or UPS.

• Have funds cashout (sic) from your bank.

• Alert Supervisor as soon as a fund is available for further assignment update.

I will need you to re-confirm your full name and mailing address for the delivery.

Regards,

Joe Phillip, Supervisor

Again he asks me for my full name and mailing address which had been provided to the company twice already. I did not respond to this particular email and it would be the last email I would receive from either Joe or Daniel. From here on out, I would be communicating with my Supervisor via Instant Messenger. Unfortunately, I did not think to save those early IM communications, but every morning when I turned on my computer, never at the scheduled 8 a.m. start time, but usually around 10 a.m., I would have this message waiting for me: “How are you this morning?” to which I would always reply “good” and that would be it for the day.

This would go on for days at a time. Some days I would forget to log on altogether. Joe didn’t seem to mind and there were never any assignments anyway. This went on for a week or two and then morning Joe caught me off guard:

8:16AM

Joe: Good Morning. How are you doing today…

10:17AM

Joe: where have you been?

10:19AM

chris.auman: I’ve been busy working on assignments and I guess I forgot to sign in to yahoo this morning. Sorry about that, boss.

10:20AM

Joe: you need to always stay online

10:20AM

chris.auman: ok, sorry. What’s up?

10:20AM

Joe: so how are you doing with your assignment?

10:21AM

chris.auman: Good. It’s a tough one, but I am making good progress.

That fact that I had not been assigned anything, didn’t seem to faze either one of us. It was just important for him that I be online from 8 a.m. to 1 p.m. I had already decided this was a work from home scam and that Joe was most likely somewhere in Western Africa at a crowded Internet cafe filled with Nigerian princes all trying to think of new ways to import those Yankee dollars. In spite of this reprimand from the boss, I made no effort to sign in earlier than 10 a.m. and sometimes did not sign in at all. Usually he didn’t seem to mind. Here is an example of a typical instant message from Joe:

10:30AM

Joe: Hello. How are you?

10:30AM

chris.auman: good

10:30AM

Joe: ok, let me know if you need anything

10:31AM

chris.auman: ok.

After several more weeks of this, Joe must have decided that the hook was sufficiently baited, I was on the line and it was time to reel me in. I received these instructions:

10:22AM

Joe: good Morning, how are you. The Company has introduced a Domestic Petty Cash Payment; the purpose for this fund is to help employees solve any domestic or emergency assignments that may require the use of funds. E.g. Shipping Payments, Packaging/ Tapes, Postages and any other related domestic Payments. You are required take 5-10 mins of your time to set up an account with www.FaceCard.com to received a Prepaid Face MasterCard for this purpose, click the link to signup http://xxxxxxxx.php

Email me with the account login details to enable the company credit the account with funds as as soon as you are through with the signup. Let me know if you need anything, brb

“Brb” meaning Be Right Back, which he never was, btw. At any rate, I chose to ingore this message as well. A few uneventul days later, I recieved this message from Mr. Joe:

10:30AM

Joe: how are you doing with your assignment

10:31AM

chris.auman: Which assignment?

10:32AM

Joe: I need you to map-out the industrial areas of your State and find out the available lands in those areas that are yet to be developed or for sale. If unable to locate such then look up very good real estate agents in your location and retrieve their contact details. Let me know if you need anything

Of course I did not do this assignment and Joe made no further inquiries as to its progress. Everything was smooth sailing with this work from home scam until Joe dropped this bombshell on me one morning:

10:50AM

Joe: where have u been?

10:53AM

chris.auman: Just making some coffee.

10:54AM

Joe: you are not taking this job serious are u

11:01AM

chris.auman: I have not received any instructions or assignments or anything but “good mornings” for over a week. What is there to take serious? I just sit here all day and do nothing.

11:08AM

Joe: Note that your assignments are been put together at the controller office. and as soon as i have it i will send them to you… but still make sure that you are always online to receive updates on your assignment

I hadn’t heard about The Controller previously. I didn’t know that it was the Controller’s job to send me assignments. This Controller seemed to be quite a slacker and not very diligent in his or her work. I made no effort to comply with Joe’s wishes that I log in on time. That was fine for a few days, then Joe got somewhat cryptic:

10:00AM

Joe: Morning to you. you are invisible

10:02AM

chris.auman: i haven’t heard from you in a week.

10:06AM

Joe: could you reconfirm your mailing address as i just receive an update from the controller office that petty cash will be mailed to you tomorrow and your salary will be mailed next week. please reconfirm your full legal name and mailing address for delivery

10:07AM

chris.auman: i’ve confirmed it many times already. why don’t you have it?

10:08AM

Joe: as ur supervisor am telling you to reconfirm it. do that now!

10:10AM

chris.auman: can you tell me why i would need petty cash?

10:13AM

Joe: the petty cash funds will be used to solve any assignment that

require the use of money. purchasing office equipments or softwares. making payment to shipping company for shipment of office supplies

10:14AM

chris.auman: so i would use the money to ship office equipment from where to where?

10:14AM

Joe: supplies will be shipped to you

10:15AM

chris.auman: what kind of supplies? to be used for what?

10:16AM

Joe: custom designed supplies, laptops printer softwares for your assignments it will be full loaded with the companies softwares

that computer equipment; laptop computer, printer, etc, etc, etc

10:19AM

Joe: are they customised to the company needs

10:19AM

chris.auman: i think they are.

End of the Scam

I was becoming bored with Joe and his work from home scam. Our weird dance of courtship was no longer providing me any amusement, so one day I decided to take the crazy up a notch or two and see if I could entice Joe back into the game. In the interest of saving space, here is a very condensed version of the message I sent him:

12:12PM

chris.auman:

Is the controller in control/

Who controls the controller?

Is the controller in control/

Who controls the controller?

Is the controller in control/

Who controls the controller?

Is the controller in control/

Who controls the controller?

I heard nothing so I lodged a formal complaint with Daniel Clark:

Dear Mr. Clark,

I would like to lodge a formal complaint against one of your employees, Mr. Joe Phillip who I have found to be abusive and mean in his treatment of me. I work diligently on my assignments as they are assigned by the Controller, yet this does not prevent Mr. Joe from harassing me about not being logged into my Yahoo IM at all times. What am I, some sort of robotic machine?

Mr. Joe sometimes asks me what I am wearing which is no small outrage in today’s modern day workplace environment. Furthermore, I believe the man to be a drunkard with few, if any scruples. His vile temper and sometimes violent BUZZing noises are disturbing to someone of my mental condition, which I assure you is under complete control with the proper medication. Am I not a valuable and highly productive part of the XXXX Team? The answer is a yes in the affirmative. All who know my work would enthusiastically agree. I demand treatment as such!

I look forward to you taking immediate action in this regard.

Very respectfully yours,

C. Auman

I received no reply to my complaint to Mr. Daniel who was most likely Mr. Joe as well. After a week of silence from this work from home scam, I sent Joe one last instant message to which he did respond:

10:08AM

chris.auman: i luv you.

10:09AM

joe: i luv you.

And it was over.

This blog post originally appeared as an entry title “The Controller” in Reglar Wiglar #24, which detailed my long and rich job history. Always read Reglar Wiglar!

Falco Album Review Einzelhaft

Post author By Chris Auman
Post date December 24, 2025
Categories In Used Records & Tapes, Zines

The following Falco album review of Einzelhaft was published in Used Records & Tapes #1 [RoosterCow Press]

Falco Album Review

Falco may be familiar to those of a certain age who remember being bombarded by “Rock Me Amadeus” circa 1986. As a result of that shelling, we can be forgiven for being a little shell-shocked by his somewhat ridiculous attempt at white boy rap. In the mid ‘80s, rap music was hardly the commercially or critically accepted force that it is today, and yet, here was this Austrian dude with one name “rapping” about Mozart.

Like Mozart, Falco was a little ahead of his time as Rob Van Winkle wouldn’t corner the Anglo-Saxon rap game until four years later. (I put the Beastie Boys in a different category for what should be obvious reasons.)

Falco Einzelhaft Album Review

All that aside, Einzelhaft is Falco’s 1982 debut album. Apparently einzelhaft means “solitary confinement” which could possibly explain the album cover which shows Falco relaxing in a chair in a room illuminated only by the light emanating from a single, high-placed window (leading us to wonder, Who is this mysterious Falco and why is he alone in that room sitting on a chair?).

Der Kommissar – Don’t Turn Around

The record starts with “Zuviel Hitze” which is kind of a lackluster way to kick off a record, in my opinion. Maybe the lyrics make up for the mediocrity of the music. Don’t know, don’t speak German, but it is a bit of a let down—not that I had terribly high hopes, mind you.

“Der Kommissar” rocks it like Amadeus, of course. It’s been a long time since I’ve heard the After the Fire cover version (an early MTV staple and the only U.S. hit for those Brits) but Falco’s original is surely the better of the two.

“Siebzehn Jahr” is kind of a groovy rocker featuring a little saxophone interlude. Sax was fairly common in the ‘80s before some bands overused it and Clarence Clemons kinda bludgeoned us in the head with it.

What Der Flucht?

“Auf der Flucht”; don’t know what der flucht this one is about but it’s the most New Wavey track on the record with Falco doing his best Andy Partridge (of XTC) imitation. Not bad. A little jazzed-up guitar makes “Hinter Uns Die Sintflut” one of the jazzier numbers—jazzy like your aunt might think your sweater is real “jazzy”.

“Nie Mehr Schule” (never more school?) is a beer hall sing-along with a horn section and a rousing chorus where one can imagine large steins of beer being hoisted into the air. I’d like to sing along too, but again, the German thing, don’t speak it. “Helden Von Heute” is a straight-up pop tune worthy of radio play in any number of decades. Like the lead-off track on the A-side, the title track, “Einzelhaft,” is the mediocre bookend to the record.

It’s interesting to me that on the liner notes the “musik” is credited to Robert Ponger with Falco getting credit for just the lyrics. Falco also doesn’t seem to have played any instruments on this record either. No writing or performing credits other than lyrics and vocals for Falco and yet the album was released under “Falco” and not “Falco and Ponger,” (which I think has a certain ring to it, by the way). That seems a little fucked, Falco.

Anyway, at a buck and a quarter, Einzelhaft, is a decent enough ‘80s pop record and a minor musical artifact to be worth it at slightly less than twice the price.

On a sad note, Johann (Hans) Hölzel aka Falco, died in a car accident in 1998 at the age of 40.

If you enjoyed this Falco album review you may enjoy reviews of Mötley Crüe, The Cars, or The Police.

The Cars Album Review

The following Cars album review review by Chris Auman was published in Used Records & Tapes #1 [RoosterCow Press]

Cars Album Review

Santa dropped some good vinyl on me one Xmas way back in the day (I imagine the albums were purchased at the downtown Ben Franklin, but that’s mere speculation.)

At the time, I hadn’t really progressed much past a Queen fixation. It was pretty much all Queen all the time, actually. So, in what was possibly 1984 or 1985, I got a handful of records which would help get my teenaged brain branching out into different directions.

One of the albums I received was The Cars self-titled debut album, ironically enough, produced by Roy Thomas Baker who put the sheen on many a Queen platter.

Despite only getting hip to this record in the mid-1980s, The Cars actually came out in 1978. The album went double platinum just a few days shy of its one-year anniversary and was still a big seller years later. The Cars followed up with a strong sophomore effort with Candy-O in 1979 and continued to deliver solid albums throughout the ‘80s.

Dominating Debut

Talk about debuts that dominate, this Boston band could have packed it all in after one record and they still would have achieved legendary status. As it was, they didn’t and therefore were able to set the tone for the coming decade and their dominance of it. Like their contemporaries, The Police, and The Pretenders, The Cars had great songs and deserved their spot on the top of the heap.

The album kicks off with a plea to “Let the Good Times Roll” — a mid-tempo, cool, hooky tune with plenty of backing vocals Roy Thomas Baker was no doubt quite comfortable with. The lyrics also contain the line, “let them brush your rock and roll hair” which Rob Pollard may wish he would have thought of first. That song would set the template for the rest of the record.

“My Best Friend’s Girlfriend” is a new wave doo-wop tune, followed by “Just What I Needed,” the third perfect pop song in a row resulting in three shots at the charts.

Doncha’ Stop

The A-side ends with “Don’t Cha Stop” which advises not stopping something if this particular something makes you feel good. Perhaps not the best advice in all situations, but it depends entirely on context.

While Ocasek’s geeky cool and lean and lanky look is a big part of the visual appeal of The Cars, and Ric is generally thought of as the leader of the band, bassist Benjamin Orr (born Orzechowski) supplies a more crooning style on three of the albums best tracks, “Moving in Stereo,” “Bye Bye Love,” and “Just What I Needed.”

It is Ocasek who takes almost all the writing credits on the LP, with only Hawkes credited as co-writer for “Moving in Stereo”.

“You’re All I’ve Got Tonight” is another great track that kicks off the B-side. As a side note, despite knowing the song title, for the longest time I thought the chorus was “You don’t like God tonight,” which would be a much darker song. In retrospect, it’s hard to believe that I could have ever misheard those lyrics and will chalk it up to the morbidity of a teenaged brain and forced Catholicism.

Bye Bye Love

“Bye Bye Love” has one of my favorite Cars lines, “it’s an orangy sky, always it’s some other guy.” “I’m In Touch with Your World” is an alien-themed song commonly found on new wave albums.

The Cars was a band of musicians, not rock stars. Elliot Easton was a precise lead guitar player whose solos were short, to the point, and so far removed from wankery as to be understated and perhaps underappreciated as a result.

Greg Hawkes had a mustache that no doubt tickled the ladies as nicely as he tickled the keys and Ex-Modern lover David Robinson is as solid on the kit as a pop-rock drummer gets.

It’s not surprising Ocasek produced Weezer’s debut as that band was The Cars of the 90s in many ways, not the least of which is the ability to write one hell of a catchy hook. A New Cars would put a tour together without their leader and David Robinson.

The Cars apparently released a record of originals with Ocasek in 2011 which I am only learning about now. Orr died in 2000 of pancreatic cancer.

More like this Cars Album Review

Thank you for reading this Cars album review. If you enjoyed reading, check out my other reviews in Used Records & Tapes zine available from my web shop.

Go back to the blog page!

The Unforgiven Album Review

The following The Unforgiven album review was published in Used Records & Tapes #1 [RoosterCow Press]

The Unforgiven Album Review

On a Friday night many years ago, while driving around rural country roads in a Chevy Chevette with two girls (who weren’t sisters but probably cousins) drinking wine coolers (Bartles & Jaymes most likely), waiting for the football game to start, I heard a song play on a mixtape and it stuck in my head for the next twenty years.

Occasionally, I would remember the tune, chorus only, and I would ask some random friend or co-worker if they had ever heard a song that went like this (and I’d sing it to them): “All is quiet, all is quiet on the Western Front/All is quiet on the Western Front.”

Blank stares. Thank god then for the Internet which solved this decades-old riddle with its Google and its Youtube.

You can be forgiven for not knowing this song or that band. Despite writing one of the most memorable pop tunes I had apparently ever heard, The Unforgiven failed to break into the pop charts and pretty much reside in obscurity these days.

The Unforgiven certainly played a poppy brand of hard rock and if these dudes would have gone the glam route with lipstick and colorful scarves, like your Poisons and Cinderellas, they may have had more success. Instead, they traveled the lonely road of the Wild West Cowboy band—or at least of a band that adopts that particular theme.

To be fair, there was somewhat of a cowpunk movement in underground ’80s rock and a bit of a “country is cool” resurgence going on with bands like Lone Justice, Rank & File, and Jason & The Scorchers. The Unforgiven were either too late to the posse, or maybe they were deemed too not-authentic-enough, or maybe they tried a little too hard to cultivate an image that failed to connect.

The Unforgiven – Album Review

The Unforgiven went all in with their schtick, complete with songs about hangings (“Hang ‘Em High”), The Civil War (“All is Quiet…”), evil men of the cloth (“The Preacher”) and just being a man in general (“I Hear The Call”). They dressed the part, wearing full-length dusters and various accoutrements of the Old West and they even asked Clint Eastwood to direct a video for them. He declined but then allegedly used the band’s name and font for his 1992 movie Unforgiven. This is a somewhat dubious claim as the band itself surely took its name from the 1960 Western, The Unforgiven of which Eastwood was no doubt much more familiar with.

I also doubt that an actor and director as associated with Westerns as Clint would be so influenced by this band or so involved with the marketing of his movie that he personally chose the font for the movie poster after being only briefly aware of their existence eight years earlier. The fonts are only slightly similar at any rate, but whatever, that rumor is out there apparently.

Short-lived Band Life

The Unforgiven were together for only three short years, but have been active more recently according to their website. During their original run, the band released one full-length record and one single: 1986’s self-titled debut album and “I Hear the Call.”

All in all, there’s some good ‘80s hard guitar pop on this record.

While the gang vocals may be a little too over-the-top for some, it is certainly a guilty pleasure for me that takes me back to that Friday night drinking wine coolers and listening to the tape player in a Chevy Chevette. — Chris Auman

If you enjoyed this Unforgiven album, you’ll love the review zine Used Records & Tapes available from my online shop!

The Police Synchronicity Review

The Police Synchronicity album cover drawing

The following The Police Synchronicity review was published in Used Records & Tapes #1 [RoosterCow Press]

The Police Synchronicity Review

The fifth studio album from The Police was a monster seller in all formats. Synchronicity, (pretentiously titled after a book that name-checks a term coined by Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung) turned these three blondes from superstars into superduper stars.

The synchronicity concept—whereby two seemingly unrelated events occur simultaneously for some purpose—seemed to be a theme connecting the songs on this album. I guess. Maybe not. Ask Sting. The only evidence of this theory seems to be the two pretentiously-titled tracks “Synchronicity I” and “Synchronicity II”.

In keeping with the theme as well, I suppose, are the two seemingly unrelated events of Copeland’s “Miss Gradenko” and Summer’s almost-unlistenable “Mother,” both lumped together on side A along with songs about dinosaurs, God, and biscuit-taking, and the aforementioned “Synchronicitys.” The B-side delivers the goods though, giving us no less than three hit songs as well as a song about desert

tea drinking.

Biggest Band in the World

Synchronicity would become The Police’s biggest-selling album and their last. What do you expect? These guys were on a nonstop, whirlwind touring and recording schedule and the end was bound to come. Allegedly, Copeland and Sting came to blows during the recording. Copeland obviously didn’t punch Sting hard enough because he was able to carry on and release such pretentiously-titled future albums like The Dream of the Blue Turtles and Nothing Like the Sun as he became a world music and tantric dork.

While this fact should make them want to give up writing and actually try to enjoy music like most humans, nothing will deter them from trying to kill everyone’s buzz one band at a time. (Vampire Weekend is a recent example of how this pointless argument resurfaces every few years.) They must have been relieved then when Sting opted to forgo the reggae and island rhythms of records past in favor of the more experimental approach of throwing horns at everything.

Best Album of the ’80s?

The question is whether Synchronicity deserves a place on such a high pedestal. Maybe yes, but mainly for the cultural impact it had on us back then. I will say, that I was down with the Synchro in 7th grade like I was down with Thriller and Business as Usual. I rolled with the trends back then.

A lot of critics (aka nerds) like to get bunched undies when bands featuring mostly white people incorporate different styles of the music of nonwhite people into their own. This of course ignores the fact that very little music played on this planet in the ‘80s or today was created in a vacuum and the origin of rock music, should they take the time to remember, was a multicultural hodgepodge of country and blues.

Listening to this record many decades later, however, and after becoming a fan of earlier Police records like the pretentiously titled Outlandos d’Amour and Reggatta de Blanc, this record is certainly not as exciting as those first efforts. Sure, it delivered the hits in spades, but it’s a dark record and kind of a bummer to listen to and nobody wants to spend that much time in Sting’s head, not even Sting.

I hope you enjoyed reading The Police Synchronicity album review! If you like ’80s music, check out my review of The Cars debut album. You can also buy yourself a copy of Used Records & Tapes zine. —Chris Auman