To say that the Woodrows are prolific would be an absurd understatement. No one really knows for certain how many live albums, box sets, bootlegs, and 7-inch records they’ve released. That said, here are a few of their more memorable albums from the past forty-plus years.
Woodrows Discography
Run, Woodrow, Run!
(RoosterCow Records) 1980
Run, Woodrow, run! That’s good advice if you’re a Woodrow. The debut album from the world’s most notorious punk band will set your heart racing. Before the world tours, never-ending controversies, and punitive prison sentences, it all started in a garage in Antigo, Wisconsin. While earlier recordings would eventually be discovered, Run, Woodrow, Run, was thought to be the first by this seminal band. Run time is only ten minutes, but that’s more than enough for 30 raunchy Woodrow’s gems. The LP contains classic Woodrows’ tunes, like, “Piss Pants,” “Ricky’s Got a Boner,” “Naked Twister,” “Firecracker,” “Zonked Out!,” “Bum Rap (Revisited),” and the all-time greatest ode to freedom, “Just Got Out of Jail and I Feel Like Gettin’ F’d Up” plus 23 more!
Shit or Get off the Pot!
(RoosterCow Records) 1980
That’s the Woodows’ way of saying “put up or shut up,” which is exactly what our boys do on this 15-minute blast of pure punk rock energy. There’s no such thing as a sophomore slump when you’re talking about the most prolific punk band in the history of recorded music. This firecracker features early Woodrows’ classics like “Weed Bag,” “Purple Nurple,” and the blistering “Dirtbag Charlie.”
Swim, Woodrow, Swim
(RoosterCow Records) 1980
When you run out of dry land, you gotta swim, Woodrow, swim! This aquatic classic features 16 explosive songs of desperation like “Backs to the Wall,” “Fight or Flee,” “Never Goin’ Down” and so many more. So, so many more. One listen to this album and you’ll never leave dry land again! You’ll have the dry heaves, for sure!
Snakes in the Grass
(RoosterCow Records) 1980
Trust me, you don’t wanna be hangin’ out in the Woodrows’ backyard! Snakes in the Grass is twenty-five fantastic tunes by the Fearsome Foursome, including raunchy Woodrows’ classics like “Mowin’ Your Lawn, Trimmin’ Your Bush,” “Ho in the Garden,” and “Fetchin’ Wood.” These tunes are sure to offend every single one of your neighbors when played at maximum volume on an early Sunday morn.
Toby’s Got A Toothache!
(RoosterCow Records) 1980
Toby’s got a toothache and man do it hurt! You ever get one of those really naaaasty toothaches? Imagine if you had teeth like that bucktooth muthereffer! Yowza! Thirty-six killer tracks make this one of the most painful Woodrows’ records to date. Features the songs, “Novocaine/Cocaine,” “Tooth on a String,” “Larry, the Tooth Fairy,” “Dental Damn!” and many, many more! Too many more!
Rock and Roll Jism
(RoosterCow Records) 1980
What a concept! What a conception! This is the first album to really get the PMRC fired up and ready for action. It would not be the last. This seminal recording features two all-time Woodrow Classics: “Rock ‘n’ Roll Jism” and “Under the Funky Hypnotic Love Table” plus 27 more! If you ain’t down with what the Scab Four are spewin’ on this record, you will never, ever be down with the Woodrows.
Beer Goggles
(RoosterCow Records) 1980
Sure, we’ve all worn ‘em, but they’re the Woodrows’ prescription! Thirteen tunes that make allowances for a few too many: “I Ain’t Afraid a Nuthin’,” “You Look Hot… Both of You,” “Six Pack Mama,” plus 12 or 13 more! If this album doesn’t offend you on some level, then you better have a good, long look in the mirror ‘cause you are not a good person.
What the F**K Did I Do Last Night?
(RoosterCow Records) 1980
I’ll bet you know that feeling, but nobody knows it better than The Woodrows. Seventeen confused and bewildered tracks that try to put the pieces back together. Features the tunes: “You Got My Pants, Man?,” “Bed Wetter Blues,” “Wet Stain,” “Where the Hell Am I? What Town Are We In?” and many, many more!
Ganja Stomp
(RoosterCow Records) 1980
Even The Woodrows need to kick back and “chillax” every once in a while. This classic album from 1980 (their tenth full-length record of that year!) features 15 songs that document the Woodrows’ brief infatuation with everything rasta and reggae. Tracks include: “Praise Almighty Jah,” “Jah is Awesome,” “I for an I,” “Rastafari Safari,” “Jah Know What I’m Sayin’? and ten more rockin’ reggae jams!!!
Tar Eater
(RoosterCow Records) 1980
Why does Marvy Woodrow like to eat tar so much? Better question: why does Marvy Woodrow like to eat so much tar? Who knows? Who cares? Recorded in just 15 minutes, this is the tightest Woodrows’ record ever! Thirty-three tracks of blistering Woodrow Power. Songs include: “Dry As A Twig,” “Rock Head,” “Slick Ricky Woodrow” and more. Always more!
An amazing thing about the Woodrows’ long recording career is their willingness to try any music genre. What some call experimentation, others call a crass attempt to cash in on a trend. At the end of the day, none of that matters, because occasionally the Woodrows luck out and record a masterpiece that defies all categories (and good taste). Case in point, the Woodrows’ 1980 concept double LP Duality. It’s equal parts artsy and fartsy and 100 percent classic Woodrows.
Woodrows Classic
Duality
(RoosterCow Records) 1980
Er, ah, um, this one is a little arty—even for ‘80s new wave! But it is The Woodrows, so you know it’s the bomb. A double LP concept record that explores the duality of man. At the dawn of a new decade the Woodrows were doing a lot of soul searching… and a lot of mind-altering substances. The result is one of the most pretentious albums in the band’s extensive catalog.
Includes: “Whispers,” “Soul Bared,” “C’est Bon, Baby,” “Whispers II” and many more. Don’t worry, nobody else gets it either! SO ESOTERIC! You don’t want your cool friends to see this one in your record collection!
II
(RoosterCow Records) 1980
This album is so epic that you’ll forget there never was a Woodrows I! This was the eleventh album released in 1980 but don’t let the boys know that II is not the Roman numeral 11. This album features no less than 32 songs including anemic anthems for the ‘80s Generation such as: “Rat Face Ricky,” “Got My Ass Kicked Last Night,” “Soggy Socks” and twenty-nine more!!
Woodrow Beach
(Woodrow Hill Records) 1981
New year, new album, new label. Woodrow Beach ain’t just off-limits in the off-season, IT’S CLOSED ALL YEAR! That’s OK, ‘cause, trust us, you wouldn’t want to swim there anyway. The album features, “Drunk on the Beach,” “High on the Beach,” “Beach Blanket Bongs,” “Sand in My Ass,” and many, many more hits! A good Woodrows tune is indeed like sand in your ass, it’s unpleasant and you can’t ignore it.
Beer, Brats & Broads
(Woodrow Hill Records) 1981
That’s brats as in bratwursts. The Woodrows’ second album of 1981 was the first installment of the ongoing “Beer, Brats & Broads” live series. Classic Woodrow tunes can barely be discerned over the chaos of feedback and drunken revelry. You may detect songs such as “Ricky’s Got a Boner,” “Weed Bag,” “Piss Pants,” and more, but really, who knows what the F is going on?
Drunk
(Woodrow Hill Records) 1981
Quite possibly the best Woodrows record ever and punk rock has yet to fully recover! Features the all-time classics; “Drunk,” “Gettin’ Drunk,” “Been Drinkin’,” “Git Drinkin’!,” “Just Had to Get Drunk Last Night,” “I’d Rather Be Drunk Than Drinkin’,” “Grab Me a Beer While You’re Up,” and many more! This album has more triggers than a double-barrel shotgun.
Acid Days
(Woodrow Hill Records) 1981
The Woodrows discover acid and look out! These trippy, dippy hippies wasted no time in getting wasted and recording some of the best psychedelic music of ALL TIME! Songs include: “Give Me (a) Piece,” “Care for Some Free Love, Ma’am?” “Hit a Bong, Get it On,” “Gimmie a Tab (and I Don’t Mean a Diet Soda)” and 20 more!!!
All Hopped Up on Goofballs
(Woodrow Hill Records) 1981
As if the Woodrows aren’t goofy enough as it is! A.D.D. ain’t the half of it! Thirty-four hyper tunes to get you totally tweaked, including: “Tree,” “Road,” “Dirt,” “Toast,” “Knife,” “Tub,” “Kill” and 27 more!! If the Woodrows could maintain focus for more than 15 minutes at a time, we wouldn’t have classics like this!
Prom Night
(Woodrow Hill Records) 1981
Of course, The Woodrows didn’t get dates to the prom! What are you NUTS? But that doesn’t mean the fellas can’t get all gussied up for their big night. Killer tunes include: “Spiked Punch & Quaaludes,” “Hang (and Then Stab) the DJ,” “Chaperone This,” “May I Have This Dance, Bitch?” and 11 more! They may not like to slow dance, but they do love to BALL!
Momma Din’t Raise No Fool
(Woodrow Hill Records) 1981
Oh yes, she did! In fact, she raised four of ‘em, but we won’t hold that against her. Sixteen infantile tunes including: “Bread Samich,” “Big Boo Boo,” “Nubby Rub,” “No-No Boom Boom”! Nobody’s really sure what the Woodrows were thinking when they wrote this infantile album, but Woodrows fans couldn’t get enough of the stuff.
Pumped
(Woodrow Hill Records) 1981
Ain’t nobody gonna give the Woodrows shit. Not after the boyz watched Conan the Barbarian 28 times in a row. These former 90-pound weaklings pump out 90 minutes of sweaty, rippling riffs, including “Woodrow’s Gym,” “Let Me Pump You… Up,” “Pummeled,” “I Ain’t No Dumbell, You Moron,” “Tight Tush Toby,” “All Pumped Up,” “Twelve Pack Abs,” and more!
Naked
(Woodrow Hill Records) 1981
The Woodrows have never been afraid to bare it all on their records. That has never been more evident than on Naked. The follow-up to the Drunk LP has twice the power and four times the fun! Thirty-seven songs including: “Naked,” “Tube Sock Toby,” “Marvy’s in the Jug Tank,” “Been Naked,” “Freak Patrol,” “Röt Güt,” “Buck Naked,” “Caught in the Raw” and more. All killer, ALL filler!
Crunch Time
(Woodrow Hill Records) 1981
When the Woodrows entered the studio to record their eleventh full-length album of 1981, it really was crunch time — they hadn’t written a single song! You know how the Woodrows give a shit about quality, right? They don’t! Lucky for us they recorded 47 tunes anyway, including “Your Amp’s Not Plugged In, Erin,” “Is This Mic On?,” and the epic, “Do We Have Enough for an Album Yet?”
Bread & Water
(Really Rad Records) 1982
The Woodrow’s third album of 1982 was not their best — not even close, but what do you expect? All 27 tracks were recorded from the Langlade County Jail! There are a few diamonds in the rough, however, including the incendiary, “Someone Dropped A Dime,” “I Didn’t Know That’s What ‘Punk’ Meant,” “I’m Not A Punk,” “Hands Above the Sheets” and more! An arresting album to say the least!
Woodrows Classic
The absolute debacle that was the “Beers, Brats & Broads Festival” can only be described as ridiculous. Never has such a drunken, sexist, misanthropic event transpired under the guise of a three-day music fest. Three days? Yeah, right! This fiasco didn’t last three hours, but it did produce one of the most exciting live albums of the 1980s.
Beer, Brats & Broads II
(Woodrow Hill Records) 1982
No one wanted another “Beer, Brats and Broads” bash — not even Woodrows fans — but the Fearsome Foursome have never been ones to get enough of a bad thing. The second year of this annual festival was not the best, nor was it the last. In fact, it was just the start of a decades-long run of drunken sacrilege and bacchanalian misadventure. On this live effort, the Woodrows rip through a blistering set of classic tunes before ending in typical Woodrows fashion with the band simultaneously passing out on stage after a chaotic fifteen-minute set. If you can make out what songs are on this album, let me know, ‘cause I have no idea!